There Are a number of points in your life when you realise you're doing something wrong. Getting your arse consistently handed to you playing an online multiplayer FPS is the one that springs to mind, having recently attended the Modern Warfare 2 event in Los Angeles.
A more stinging example is when you decide to have a sensible night's sleep to avoid the more obnoxious symptoms of jetlag: and the first person you meet in the morning says, 'I went to a strip club last night - $25 and she let me smack her arse!' The look of unparalleled joy on his face, and the fact I wasn't even jealous, left me feeling like I was missing out on what it means to be alive.
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Anyway, back on track. Call of Duty might have flown the PC coop and built gigantic, billion-dollar nests on the consoles, but while Sony and Microsoft wage the war of special edition consoles and timed exclusives, let's just be glad that Infinity Ward are committed to PC development, and let's never talk of Call of Duty 3 again.
So far, we've had a glimpse of MW2s single-player campaign, and the Special Ops co-op mode has been showcased briefly. Today, though, it's all about the PvP multiplayer side - with three new maps cycling on the 32 machines. Favela is your dusty shanty town, with tight maze-like roads occasionally opening up into areas filled with burnt-out cars and fizzing pylons. Then there's the dusty expanses of Afghan, with mountainous brown terrain and bunkers providing hiding places and sniping spots. Finally there's High Rise, which breaks with the dusty theme and lets you wage war around an office block and on roof-tops.
Killing Points
Pie multiplayer side of Modern Warfare was characterised by two things: progress and prestige. In terms of progress, the kill streak awards were instant reward for persistent murder, and the levelling and unlock system provided a compelling wider picture to keep you going. For prestige - well, you could trade all your progress for a shiny badge that proves you're awesome.
Death streaks give heroic losers the chance to redeem themselves, with health boosts and the ability to steal your killer's class, to see how he was kitted out The unlocks are constant too. Level three grants access to all five predefined classes, and level five lets you create five custom classes.
A class load-out now consists of your unlocked primary and secondary weapon, two pieces of equipment, three of your unlocked perks, and a death streak.
The prestige elements have I also been built up. Now, you don't just get to show off with a badge that proves you've voluntarily given up your top-level soldier 10 times, like some kind of suicidal maniac.
Now you unlock emblems through a separate achievements system. This is connected to Accolades - end-of-game awards given to those with high kill-to-death ratios, or who've done good at protecting their flag.
In the potentially intimidating world of online shooters, MW2 tries to be friendly, offering bonuses for every notable situation. Killing someone who's nearing a kill streak or who's recently killed you or a teammate; using a variety of weapons - all these things offer an XP boost and awards that can lend even the worst player a sense of dignity.
When you get that balance right, thrilling the hardcore and letting the ungifted join in, you're onto something pretty big. Modern Warfare 2s multiplayer is nothing desperately innovative, but it's a completely slick and friendly experience that looks set to easily replace its predecessor in the multiplayer throne.
The Gunned-Down Rundown
What's new, without bullet points
When there's nothing ground-breakingly new, but a lot of little tweaky improvements, it's difficult to summarise why a game's better, especially in a way that won't alienate people that haven't played the first Modern Warfare multiplayer. So here's a wee list of what we know. There are at least three maps - Favela, Afghan, and High Rise - and two new multiplayer modes - Capture the Flag (really, it's new - don't question it) and Demolition, which involves planting a couple of bombs.
You'll have 15 kill streaks to unlock, nine of which have been revealed, with menus implying that the being able to fire at your opponents from an AC-BO Gunship plane is only the third-best Meanwhile, there's a new world of customisation both useful (death streaks and secondary weapons) and cosmetic (emblems and accolades).